He Knows My Denial
Scripture Reading: Mark 14:27-31,66-72
Meditation
Tonight, Satan’s on the prowl and he’s salivating at the thought of a double portion—the Shepherd and his flock.
Everyone knows that, once the Shepherd is gone, the sheep are easy prey. Attack Jesus and his disciples will scatter.
“I will strike the shepherd;
The sheep will go helter-skelter”.1
But as Satan stalks, Jesus prays.
While Jesus walks with his disciples toward the Mount of Olives, he warns them that their world is about to fall apart. In a few hours, their Messianic dreams will turn into a nightmare. Unthinkable fears will be realized; unimaginable pain will be endured.
The disciples’ hopes will be shattered, scattered into too many fragments to piece back together. In the days to come, their faith will grope around in the darkness, desperately seeking something to grasp but finding nothing to hold. In the past, the disciples had stood by Jesus during his greatest trials. But in the attack that is about to come, they will all desert him. The coming days will bring times of tribulation unlike any the disciples have ever seen—unbearable to speak of, even more unbearable to pass through.
Soon, a pack of wolves, led by Judas, will come out to the Garden. When they bare their teeth and encircle Jesus, every one of the disciples will turn tail and run. They will forsake the Shepherd and save their own skin. None will remain. No one will stand by Jesus. No one will speak up. Instead, they will deny that they ever knew him.
On the way, Jesus tries to warn his disciples, especially Simon Peter.
“Simon, stay on your toes. Satan has tried his best to separate all of you from me, like chaff from wheat. Simon, I’ve prayed for you in particular that you not give in or give out. When you have come through the time of testing, turn to your companions and give them a fresh start.”2
These words are difficult for Simon Peter to hear. Throughout Jesus’ ministry, he’s been the most outspoken of the flock. When Jesus had asked the disciples their opinion about who he was, it was Simon who stood up and insisted that Jesus was the Messiah, the very Son of the living God.
Peter’s confession and conviction are rock solid. He’s passionate about following Christ, confident in his own leadership, and adamant about his faithfulness. Peter is insistent, to the point of making cutting comparisons to the rest of the disciples. He claims that he is both ready and willing to die for his Master.
“Even if everyone else is ashamed of you when things fall to pieces, I won’t be.”3
Simon Peter bellows big words but they are words inflated with pride. They are filled with the air of self and not the spirit of faith. Just before they arrive at the Garden, Jesus deflates Peter’s boasting by piercing it with a pointed prediction of defection.
“Don’t be so sure. Today, this very night in fact, before the rooster crows twice, you will deny me three times.”4
Jesus’ words are sharp and they are meant to puncture Peter’s pride.
His denial is not only certain; it’s close. Imminent. No matter what Peter says, Jesus knows that it will happen. He is so sure of the event that he gives Peter the time, manner, frequency, and sign: tonight, a public disavowing, three times a denial, two times a rooster will crow.
Peter breathes deep, puffs his chest out, and shouts back in protest,
“Even if I have to die with you, I will never deny you.” All the others said the same thing.5
When Jesus arrives at the Garden of Gethsemane, the back-and-forth talk with Simon ends and prayer with his Father begins. After hours of great agony of soul, Jesus accepts the cup of suffering. He walks the way of the Father and goes out to meet his betrayer. As Judas approaches, Jesus bares his neck to the jaws of his enemy. Judas identifies him with a kiss. The soldiers bind him, strike him, and—as predicted—the flock scatters.
In the early morning hours, while the Jewish Ruling Council mock trials Jesus, Peter makes his way to the courtyard of the Chief Priest. While the religious leaders are inside, looking for a way to make the death penalty stick to Jesus, Peter mingles with the servants outside, warming himself by the fire. Love has brought him near but fear keeps him at a safe distance.
In the glow of the fire, a servant girl recognizes Peter. She points him out to the rest as a Christ-follower but Peter denies it. Afraid of being outed as a follower of Christ, Peter leaves the fire and goes out onto the porch. As if on cue, a rooster crows. A few moments later, the servant girl spots Peter in the archway and insists, to his face, that he is one of the disciples. Once again, Peter denies it.
After a little while, those gathered around the fire bring it up one more time.
“You’ve got to be one of them. You’ve got ‘Galilean’ written all over you.”
Now Peter got really nervous and swore, “I never laid eyes on this man you’re talking about.” Just then the rooster crowed a second time. Peter remembered how Jesus had said, “Before a rooster crows twice, you’ll deny me three times.”6
As the rooster crows the second time, Jesus’ prediction and Peter’s betrayal meet. Fear has raised its voice and has silenced love. No longer proud or standing tall, Peter collapses in tears.
But in the tears, Peter holds on to the words of Jesus,
“But after I am raised up, I will go ahead of you, leading the way to Galilee.”7
“When you have come through the time of testing, turn to your companions and give them a fresh start.”8
Jesus’ prayer will have its way. Though the Shepherd is struck and the sheep are scattered, there will be a reunion. After the time of testing, death will be conquered, fear will be silenced, and Peter’s love will be given voice once again.
Reflection
What bold and boastful statements have you made about your fidelity to Jesus?
In what ways have you been overcome by fear and denied any association with Christ?
When was the last time you felt like your world was falling to pieces and that you were left as a sheep without a Shepherd?
In what ways do you need Jesus to intercede for you against the schemes of Satan?
Prayer
Father,
I have made boastful statements about my fidelity to your Son. I have set up scenarios in my mind and bragged about the things that I would do or say. In my pride, I have compared myself to others, placing my actions on a higher pedestal. But when the time of testing comes, I often find myself like Peter: deserting the Christ; denying any association with him; defending myself; giving in to fear and finding my faith giving out.
I am weeping many tears.
During this day, remind me that your Son lives to intercede for me. Assure me that, though my world might be falling to pieces, the plans of the Savior aren’t falling apart. When I stray, comfort me with the promise that the Shepherd will search for me—none of the flock will be lost. Like Peter, when I go through the time of testing and fail, restore me with grace so that I might turn to my companions and give them a fresh start.
In the name of Jesus I pray. Amen.
1Mark 14:27 2Luke 22:31-32 3Mark 14:29 4Mark 14:30
5Mark 14:31 6Mark 14:70-72 7Mark 14:28 8Luke 22:32
All Scripture references in the meditation are marked by italics and are taken from the Gospel reading for the day. Those verses quoted outside of the chosen reading for the day are noted. All Scripture quoted in this post is taken from THE MESSAGE: Copyright © 1993, 1994, 1995, 2000, 2001 & 2002. Used by permission of NavPress Publishing Group. All rights reserved.